A breif Long walk with Jesus years ago
This is somthing I don't ever think I'll ever forget, and it really took me about 5 yrs to totaly understand.
It was the summer of 2001, and Elana and I where at odds again, fighting like cats and dogs, she was living up north at cold lake with her folks, and I was down at wardlow living on the old Wilkinson place. I was having a real tough time dealing with all the pain and stress of what was ripping through my life, so I was drinkin' - my age old way of burying pain and stress- But you guessed it it really wasn't working it was making stuff worse for me. And somehow I knew there was a better answer, actully not somehow everytime I talked to Elana, she was going to church, and amazing things where happening in here life, actul unbeliving things- they where preying over her up there, they where cutting demons off her back up there, she was feeling better then ever, except for the fact that I wasn't with her. I didn't belive what was going on was real, I remember thinkin' and telling her " What kind of s**t do you got yourself into " " Are these guys that are doing this to you really excepted by the church?" " demons are a figment of your imagination" " You need to get Yourself into some real help go to the doctor not to church" etc................. The insensetive jack ass that I was, once again was ripping down her fondations with my own ingronce. I'm sorry Elana, This once again just proves what a jerk I was please forgive me.
What was happening in her life was in retrospect real amazing, but I didn't belive it, I even started studing the bible a bit to more or less disprove or argue what she was saying. But its funny about simple truths and the word- YOU CAN NOT ARGUE IT !!!! And she planted a seed in me, and deep down I knew that jesus was the answer for all my pain for all my suffering for all my short comings, Thank you Elana.
I remember it like it was yesterday, I went in to town and to st. Marys rc church, and asked to talk to the father, he was a very nice beared man, and for the life of me I can't remember his name. We went into his office and began to talk, I could tell that he honestly cared about what was happening in my life, he preyed over me, and offered me some advice. " Travis when stuff starts bugging you, go for a walk, pound all of lifes frustrastion into the ground and prey Travis just prey. And what ever you do don't drink anymore the only thing that booze is going to do for you is make you hurt even more".
Well we walked out of the church together, and where standing by the truck together and was talking a bit more and he pointed over to Daiy Queen and said " Why don't you treat your self to a treat" ( in retrospect I think he wanted me to take him to dairy queen for a blizzard) and I replied " Oh i'm going to treat myself to a treat but its not going to be ice cream" said my good byes and headed for the closest liquere store where I bought a flat of beer and and a 60 onz bottle of vodka, and headed home there was another welder staying with me and we were doing what welders do best.
Got home and me and Scooter tore into the booze pretty hard, by 11 pm we had drank it all, and I went to bed, where I decided to take the fathers advice and start preying, and started to cry, so I preyed some more and cryed some more, the harder I preyed the harder I cryed. So I decided to go for a walk " Pound all that hurt into the ground".
So I headed out in the dark (there was no moon and dark as the indides of a cow) south about a 1/4 mile to the main road, and was preying to jesus " help me jesus" and by the time I got to the main road I was feeling pretty good. So I decided to keep on a walking or stumbling as it was. All I was wearing was a tee shirt boxer shorts and my sandals, and if you know the contry I live in and have ever walked on gravel roads in sandles you'll know that I was'nt very intelligent. I headed west towards my moms about 5 miles away shouting out loud helliliehyeh, praize the lord , I was going to walk all the way to my moms it felt so good.................. Well about half way there I was tired, cold and my feet hurt from all the rock getting cought between my sandles and feet, " should I turn around an go home, or is it closer to moms?" I decided in all my drunken brillance that it was closer to moms so I forged a head. And when I got to the cross roads where I needed to turn north I was sort of LOST. The red light of the mirowave tower to the north, was on what I thought to be the south, "Man I drank way to much" and headed south the wrong way! I walked and I walked for what seemed to be forever, I could hear coyotes howling, in the picth black night, and really it was scaring me, I thought all kinds of things it felt as though somthing was stalking me. Where was moms house i didn't think that her house was this far. I thought that I should of went down the creek hill long ago. When I got to Ike Zeers texas gate I knew that I was headed the wrong way, and turned around, and started running mostly out of fear. Dosn't make any sense if you know me, I'm a 6 foot 250 lb ogure that you wouldn't think would be scared of anything , BUT IT WAS REAL SCAREY OUT THERE, I FELT AS THOUGH SOMTHING WAS STALKING ME!!!!!!! All sorts of things where running through my head.
Well about 6 am I finaly got to my moms house and started knocking on my lil siss window to let me in, She asked me what are you doing? " I went for a long walk with Jesus" I replided, and left it as that, she drove me home, probly think what a losser her big brother was.
It took me about 4 and a half yrs to understand the impact of that night, what the lord tried to teach me. How taking the wrong road in life will just get you lost even more, we all have morals and feelings in the pit of are stomachs that urge us to take the right path weather we have the lord in us or not, its just when the devil clouds your judgement either through booze or even jealousy that we make poor decisoin, The key is not to open the door to the devil and let him cload your jugdement and i think you'll take the right path every time.
It was the summer of 2001, and Elana and I where at odds again, fighting like cats and dogs, she was living up north at cold lake with her folks, and I was down at wardlow living on the old Wilkinson place. I was having a real tough time dealing with all the pain and stress of what was ripping through my life, so I was drinkin' - my age old way of burying pain and stress- But you guessed it it really wasn't working it was making stuff worse for me. And somehow I knew there was a better answer, actully not somehow everytime I talked to Elana, she was going to church, and amazing things where happening in here life, actul unbeliving things- they where preying over her up there, they where cutting demons off her back up there, she was feeling better then ever, except for the fact that I wasn't with her. I didn't belive what was going on was real, I remember thinkin' and telling her " What kind of s**t do you got yourself into " " Are these guys that are doing this to you really excepted by the church?" " demons are a figment of your imagination" " You need to get Yourself into some real help go to the doctor not to church" etc................. The insensetive jack ass that I was, once again was ripping down her fondations with my own ingronce. I'm sorry Elana, This once again just proves what a jerk I was please forgive me.
What was happening in her life was in retrospect real amazing, but I didn't belive it, I even started studing the bible a bit to more or less disprove or argue what she was saying. But its funny about simple truths and the word- YOU CAN NOT ARGUE IT !!!! And she planted a seed in me, and deep down I knew that jesus was the answer for all my pain for all my suffering for all my short comings, Thank you Elana.
I remember it like it was yesterday, I went in to town and to st. Marys rc church, and asked to talk to the father, he was a very nice beared man, and for the life of me I can't remember his name. We went into his office and began to talk, I could tell that he honestly cared about what was happening in my life, he preyed over me, and offered me some advice. " Travis when stuff starts bugging you, go for a walk, pound all of lifes frustrastion into the ground and prey Travis just prey. And what ever you do don't drink anymore the only thing that booze is going to do for you is make you hurt even more".
Well we walked out of the church together, and where standing by the truck together and was talking a bit more and he pointed over to Daiy Queen and said " Why don't you treat your self to a treat" ( in retrospect I think he wanted me to take him to dairy queen for a blizzard) and I replied " Oh i'm going to treat myself to a treat but its not going to be ice cream" said my good byes and headed for the closest liquere store where I bought a flat of beer and and a 60 onz bottle of vodka, and headed home there was another welder staying with me and we were doing what welders do best.
Got home and me and Scooter tore into the booze pretty hard, by 11 pm we had drank it all, and I went to bed, where I decided to take the fathers advice and start preying, and started to cry, so I preyed some more and cryed some more, the harder I preyed the harder I cryed. So I decided to go for a walk " Pound all that hurt into the ground".
So I headed out in the dark (there was no moon and dark as the indides of a cow) south about a 1/4 mile to the main road, and was preying to jesus " help me jesus" and by the time I got to the main road I was feeling pretty good. So I decided to keep on a walking or stumbling as it was. All I was wearing was a tee shirt boxer shorts and my sandals, and if you know the contry I live in and have ever walked on gravel roads in sandles you'll know that I was'nt very intelligent. I headed west towards my moms about 5 miles away shouting out loud helliliehyeh, praize the lord , I was going to walk all the way to my moms it felt so good.................. Well about half way there I was tired, cold and my feet hurt from all the rock getting cought between my sandles and feet, " should I turn around an go home, or is it closer to moms?" I decided in all my drunken brillance that it was closer to moms so I forged a head. And when I got to the cross roads where I needed to turn north I was sort of LOST. The red light of the mirowave tower to the north, was on what I thought to be the south, "Man I drank way to much" and headed south the wrong way! I walked and I walked for what seemed to be forever, I could hear coyotes howling, in the picth black night, and really it was scaring me, I thought all kinds of things it felt as though somthing was stalking me. Where was moms house i didn't think that her house was this far. I thought that I should of went down the creek hill long ago. When I got to Ike Zeers texas gate I knew that I was headed the wrong way, and turned around, and started running mostly out of fear. Dosn't make any sense if you know me, I'm a 6 foot 250 lb ogure that you wouldn't think would be scared of anything , BUT IT WAS REAL SCAREY OUT THERE, I FELT AS THOUGH SOMTHING WAS STALKING ME!!!!!!! All sorts of things where running through my head.
Well about 6 am I finaly got to my moms house and started knocking on my lil siss window to let me in, She asked me what are you doing? " I went for a long walk with Jesus" I replided, and left it as that, she drove me home, probly think what a losser her big brother was.
It took me about 4 and a half yrs to understand the impact of that night, what the lord tried to teach me. How taking the wrong road in life will just get you lost even more, we all have morals and feelings in the pit of are stomachs that urge us to take the right path weather we have the lord in us or not, its just when the devil clouds your judgement either through booze or even jealousy that we make poor decisoin, The key is not to open the door to the devil and let him cload your jugdement and i think you'll take the right path every time.
posted by scattered seeds at 6:55 AM
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